Some times we become confused we lose track of what is going on to us? what are we doing to ourself? We face a lots of problem. Our relations with loved ones start becoming crippled. It’s just... one thing after another. Misery generates misery. It is a vicious cycle. We think everyone is selfish, manipulative and a social parasite. We lose our faith in good. And, that is really bad.
If that is the case, I hope this one blog post helps.
Now,
Mm mm.... Acknowledge that it will continue unless you become aware and drop out of the vicious circle.
One misery leads to another... one conflict leads to another... one sadness into another sadness – because whatsoever you are passing becomes more easy to go into again. Your whole being becomes channelised, mm? One day you are angry – another day, anger comes easily. The next day it comes almost automatically. You need not do anything – it will come. And if you go on getting into the habit of it, you go on feeding it.
You may like to come out of it, but liking is not enough. You may like to come out of it, but you will still continue with the old pattern unless you take a very very aware decision to come out of it. That means that after that moment, you have to do something which is the opposite.
If you have been angry, then do something which is just the contrary to break the habit. Not only that – when you break a habit, energy is released. If you don’t use that energy, again the habit will have to be formed by the mind; otherwise, where will the energy go? So always move to the opposite.
If you have been sad, try to be happy. Not like a hypocrite. That is, suppose a friend has wronged you. You are angry and in misery. Sadness engulfs you. Now you are emphasising your self that you are happy. That your friend was indeed an enemy you failed to recognise. You plan a revenge on him/her. That is hypocrisy. This is not becoming happy in stead you will end up corroding your self from within. You will suppress the sadness and inflict other loved ones with that sadness. Then It will appear to you that every other person is unworthy of you or vice-versa. This will generate more bitterness more frustration. It has no end. Unless you become conscious. Aware. Then with that awareness move into the opposite direction. From sadness to happiness. Real Happiness. You can be happy about many things. For the wonderful journey of life. For flowerbeds, Rivers, mountains, beautiful animals and trees. But, avoid hypocrisy. Don't say unto yourself that I am happy that I came to realise that my friend indeed was a foe. No that is not true. You know that. Just face the fact of moment. Reserve all judgements and be forgiving not for them but for yourself.
It is difficult, because the old path is the way of least resistance – it is easier – and to be happy you will have to make an effort. You will have to consciously give a fight to the dead mechanical habits of the mind. So you will have to re-condition it. That is, you create a new habit of being happy.
Unless a new habit is created – of being happy – the old habit is bound to persist, because the energy needs some outlet. You cannot simply remain without any outlet. You will die, you will suffocate. If your energy is not becoming love, it is bound to become sour, bitter; anger, sadness. Sadness is not the problem – neither is anger or unhappiness. The problem is how not to get into the old rut.
So live a little more consciously. And when you find yourself getting into the old habit, just do the opposite immediately – don’t wait for a single moment. It is easy – once you know the knack of how to do it. You are getting set... just do something!
Anything will do. Go for a long walk, start dancing. Let the dance be a little sad in the beginning, mm? It is bound to be – you are sad, how can you suddenly become happy? Start dancing in sadness and the dancing will divert the sadness. You have brought something new into the sadness which has never been there before. You have never danced before when you were unhappy and sad, so you will puzzle the mind. The mind will feel at loss – what to do? – because the mind can only function with the old. Anything new, and the mind is simply inefficient – and that’s the problem.
Habits are efficient, so you do them again and again, and the more you do, the more capable you become. Almost everybody has become a certain type of expert – one part of your mind expertises, and then through expertise, it dominates the whole mind.
I was just reading an anecdote....
One school teacher told the famous story of the elephant and the five blind men to his children – but he didn’t mention the word blind. He wanted to give them an opportunity to find that out for themselves.
So he told the whole story – that five men went to see an elephant and then they reported back. One said ’The elephant is like a pillar’ – because he had touched only the legs. Another said ’He is like a very big fan’ – because he had touched the ear – and so on and so forth. The story was simple, and everybody knows about it.
Then the teacher said, ’What type of men were these?’ One small boy said, ’Experts!’(laughter)
Everybody by and by becomes expert – expert in sadness, expert in unhappiness, expert in anger. Then you become afraid of losing your expertness, because you have become so efficient.
Feeling sad – dance, or go and stand under the shower and see sadness disappearing from your body as the body heat disappears. Feel that with the water showering on you, the sadness is being removed just as perspiration and dust is removed from the body. And see what happens.
Try to put the mind in such a situation that it cannot function in the old way. Anything will do.... In fact all the techniques that have been developed through the centuries are nothing but ways of trying to distract the mind from the old patterns.
For example, if you are feeling angry, just take a few deep breaths. Inhale deeply, exhale deeply – just for two minutes – and then see where your anger is. You confuse the mind; it cannot correlate. ’Since when,’ the mind starts asking, ’did anyone ever breathe deeply with anger? What is going on?’
So do anything – but never repeat it; that’s the point. Otherwise if each time you feel sad you take a shower, the mind will get into that habit. After three or four times, the mind learns that this is okay – so you are sad; that’s why you are taking a shower. Then it becomes part and parcel of your sadness. No, never repeat it. Just go on puzzling the mind every time. Be innovative... be imaginative, mm? Bhikshu (her partner) says something, and you feel angry, and you have always wanted to hit him or throw something at him. This time, change – go and hug him. Give him a good kiss, and puzzle him also (laughter). Your mind will be puzzled... he will be puzzled. Suddenly things are no more the same. Then you will see that the mind is a mechanism; how with the new it is simply at a loss, that it cannot cope with the new.
So the whole methodology of Yoga, Tantra – all religion as such – is to always bring in something new... a new breeze into the room. Open up the window and let in a new breeze.
One man who used to be a colleague of mine, was a very angry man – angry with the wife, angry with the children, angry with the boss – and for nothing. And he knew it! Who does not know it? He was really in trouble because he was creating so many problems unnecessarily.
One day he asked me what to do. I said, ’Do one thing: whenever you feel angry, just clench both your fists. You can do it anywhere. Even if you are talking to the boss and you feel angry, clench your fists – and see.’ He said, ’What will that do?’ I said for him to just try it. So he went to the boss and when he started feeling angry – because the boss was thinking to throw him out because he was doing so many things – he clenched his fists, and suddenly the anger was gone.
He came back and said that it was miraculous. But I told him not to do it again, otherwise the whole miracle is gone!
So do this for a few days... and you will enjoy it tremendously.
Remember Never Do It Again.
